How Much Can It Take to Tip Us?

The following story is fiction. Bobby is a made up character that we created to show teens that there is hope. Our reason for doing this blog is to show students that people do care. We haven’t gone through this personally, but by looking around and seeing friends and family take on the beast, we feel that more people need to be aware that they are not alone. We chose Bobby to be a teenager since teens can be relate to him as a student.

Image result for grades bad dsHow Much Can It Take to Tip Us? Image result for grades bad ds

Bobby is a freshman in high school who is a straight A student. His worst subject is math. He tries his hardest but he can’t keep his grade up. He does all his homework but can’t keep up with the amount of work he gets from his math teacher.

His parents push him to get good grades all the times, with nothing less than a B for a grade. His dad is an accountant and his mom is a science teacher. The 2 together are always putting pressure on him and his younger sister, Lilly.

He is sitting in his math class when the dreadful news comes out. “Your report cards are coming out next Monday. The grades are being put in on Friday.”

He felt his heartbeat speed up and his palms started to sweat. One more week. That’s all he had to get his D up to an A.  The teacher was calling people up one at a time to check their grades. As it got closer to his name, his heartbeat got faster and his palms sweater.

“Bobby Lee,” he stood up slowly to go talk to his teacher. She took him out into the hall, this is the first time she had done this to any student.

“Bobby I’m worried for you. This is the only class you don’t have an A in,” the teacher said.

He didn’t answer. He couldn’t answer. His dad was going to kill him. He couldn’t let his parents see his grade, they would never forgive him for it.

“Bobby?”

No answer. “You can talk to me if you ever need to. Go back inside and finish your homework.”

He walked back into the classroom, nobody was looking at him. He sat back down and stared at his equation. What do you do with the ‘y’?

The next Monday came and he was heading home from school, the report card inside his backpack. What were his parents going to say? The D was burning into his back. He got off the bus, his heart exploding in his chest.

“I have to hide it,” he thought to himself. “If they can’t find it they won’t be able to yell at me.” He walked inside his house and ran upstairs into the bathroom. He ripped the report card from his bag and placed it behind the pipes in the sink. Nobody would find it there, right?

He walked downstairs, he could feel himself being judged by his classmates, teachers, and parents. Can anything be worse than getting a bad grade? His face was flushed from running up the steps. His mom was waiting for him to come back down.

“Can’t wait to see your report card at dinner!” she smiled and walked to the dinner table.

“Lilly!” Bobby screamed. She should have been home by now.

“What?” she walked out of her room, her face has tear marks on it.

“No luck getting it up I guess?” Bobby asked.

“Still a B..” she whispered under her breathe. Bobby walked up the steps and got pulled into her room. “Bobby what am I going to do?”

“Don’t worry Lilly, once they see mine your B will look perfect. I can promise you that.”

“What did you get? A C?”

“Worse… look let’s not talk about it. I know dad’s is going to be really mad.”

They unlocked the door and walked downstairs, their parents waiting for them.

“Go get your report cards. We will look at Lilly’s first, then Bobby’s.” The two walked slowly up the steps. Bobby walked into the bathroom and Lilly into her room to get it out of her backpack. They both got their report cards and slowly made their way downstairs. Their mom and dad were smiling at each other, that was going to change soon.

Her mom took one look at Lilly’s and her face fell. “Lilly! What is that? Do you think this is acceptable? Go to your room and get me you phone and computer. Keep your grades straight A’s for two terms then you might get them back! Now go!” Lilly was crying as she ran upstairs to her room.

Bobby took another look at his report card and then ran. He couldn’t be sitting there when his parents looked at it. He ran upstairs then locked himself in the bathroom. His breathing was uneven and his heart was pounding. He hasn’t had an anxiety attack in over two years. And here it is, an anxiety attack.

He heard his parents’ footsteps running up the steps. He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t see. He fell to the floor and curled into a ball. He heard his mom pounding on the door, “Let me in now! Bobby Christopher Lee!”

The door flew open as his father kicked open the door. His parents ran in and continued to scream at him. His father had taken him by the ear and threw him into his room.

“… and don’t come out till your grade is up!” that was the last thing he heard before he blacked out.

He woke up the next day with a headache and his lungs were on fire. He needed water. Bobby walked to the door and tried to open it, locked. He calmed himself down and yelled out for Lilly. The door knob was pulled and the door opened. His mom stood there, her eyes were red and puffy.

“I’m sorry. I should have stopped your father from locking you in. He wasn’t in his right mind, he was blinded by his rage,” his mom was looking at him, pleading for him to answer.

“I’m sorry,” his voice was raspy, “I should have asked for your help instead of trying to find my own way.”

He was looking at the floor, he couldn’t meet his mom’s eyes. What if she was mad at him again? “We are going to get you and Lilly a tutor to help with your grades. We want to help.”

Over the next few months, Lilly and Bobby had gotten their grades up. Lilly had an A in science and Bobby got his D up to a B. Everything was going well and the siblings are doing great. Bobby hasn’t had an anxiety attack since. The two siblings still feel pressure from their parents but they know that they are not alone with their grades, even if they feel that way.

fixed-rules-and-tight-control-characterize-authoritarian-discipline-dr9Y6E-clipart.jpg (250×319)

Research from Freshman Classes at Ryle:

90% of the girls get all As and the other 10% get all Bs. The boys are more split, 70% of the boys get As, 20% get Bs, and 10% get Cs.

All the girls are encourages to get good grades from their parents and 80% feel that their parents pressure them to get good grades. The boys are almost the same, their parent encourage them to get good grades, but only 70% feel pressure from their parents to get grades.

40% of the girls feel pressure from teacher and 40% also feel pressure from their peers when it comes to grades. 80% of the boys feel pressure from teacher when it comes to grades. 50% feel that their peers also pressure them to do well in school.

Are research has shown that in one freshman class students feel pressure from not only there parents but from teacher and peers. If we compare this to the University of Chicago’s research, click here to read it,  it matches. Most students seem to pass there freshman year with As and B’s and few to none fail.

Pressure from parents push some kids over the edge, like Bobby. They feel that they have to get 100s on everything, even though that is very difficult to do. With our research, 75% of students feel pressure from parents to get good grades. Stanford did a study on this, read it here.

Pressure by parents and schools to achieve top scores has created stress levels among students—beginning as early as elementary school—that are so high that some educators regard it as a health epidemic, said Denise Clark Pope, a lecturer in the School of Education and the author of Doing School: How We Are Creating a Generation of Stressed Out, Materialistic and Miseducated Students. “The number one cause of visits to Vaden Health Center used to be relationships, but now is stress and anxiety,” she said.

Above is a direct quote from the study. With parents pressuring us so much, our stress and anxiety is rising quickly. This adds to pressure we feel daily from school.

Many students need financial aid. So order it get this they need to do well in school. They also may need to do well in extracurricular activities like sports. With these achievements they can apply for scholarships to help pay for college. Scholarship Research, what scholarship can you apply for?

Many students feel stress and anxiety from school and various activities. We may feel pressured by our parent, teacher, friends, siblings, and classmates. This can result in a drop in our grades. These Drops in teen grades. can affect how we views ourselves, and what we might expect from our parents (reactions).Family_clip_art_400x400.jpg (400×400)Last week my friend ran out of the room crying. She had an anxiety attack during a band playing test. This happens every time she takes one of these test. It hasn’t got any better and it seems to be getting worse. Looking at her go through this without anyway to help her, it breaks my heart. Her going through this alone isn’t a good thing. We are helping her through this day by day. Even though we never had it to this level that Bobby or she has, we know what they are going through. We would like to know if you have gone through this and how you got through. Please share your thought to help keep people from experiencing this to an extreme level and to help people reduce and get ride of their anxiety from grades.

To read about others experiences with this problem, click here.

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